How To Manage The Stress Of Buying A House

Beth Kirton

7 - Minute Read

PUBLISHED: Jul 11, 2022

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There's no doubt that some things associated with buying a house can stress you out – from affording the costs to legal technicalities and confusing real estate jargon. But none of that has ever stopped aspiring home buyers from achieving this major milestone.

For over a century, the dream of homeownership has motivated many prospective home buyers to brave the stress of buying a house to have a place to call their own.

But there are ways to tame home buying stress. You can use our proven strategies to confidently navigate the home buying process and reduce the stress of buying a house.

Why Is Buying A House So Stressful?

One reason buying a house is so stressful is that you’re making a significant investment – and doing it while juggling so many factors – like time, money and a competitive market. The National Association of REALTORS® (NAR) reports that an average of four million houses are bought and sold annually, indicating a firm demand for homeownership despite the stress.

Get familiar with common sources of stress during the home buying process so you can stay calm.

The Money

Buying a home may be the biggest financial transaction of your life – and getting a mortgage is a rigorous process. It’s typically the first time a lender takes a hard look at your financial health. You’ll also need to save for a down payment and closing costs as you inch closer to closing day.

You may also need to get your credit score and debt-to-income ratio (DTI) in shape by paying off debt. To help secure favorable mortgage rates, it may make sense to pause the home buying process to improve your credit score and reduce debt, but that strategy will likely add time to your home buying timeline and require a lifestyle change.

The Market

A seller’s market typically features bidding wars, high demand and low inventory – and this type of market can be especially tough on buyers. You may have heard stories of home buyers submitting dozens of no-contingency offers on homes, even sight unseen, before finally getting an offer accepted. Or you may have even heard of buyers who stopped house hunting out of sheer exhaustion.

The Uncertainty

Buying a house typically involves a lot of uncertainty. Between expected (and unexpected) home buying fees, home prices and fluctuating interest rates – the unpredictability of the housing market can feel overwhelming, especially for first-time home buyers.

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Why Homeownership Is Worth It

While purchasing a home is widely recognized as one of life’s most stressful events, people continue to buy homes because homeownership offers many advantages. If you get anxious along the way or contemplate quitting, remind yourself of some benefits of owning a new home:

  • Owning a home puts you in a position to build wealth through equity.
  • A home that appreciates in value is a profitable investment.
  • You can enjoy some satisfaction knowing you’ve achieved a major financial goal.
  • Buying a house can provide a sense of security.

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How To Manage And Reduce Home Buying Stress

Here are some tried-and-true strategies home buyers can implement to help minimize the stress of buying a house:

1. Take Time To Get Ready

Enter a competitive housing market prepared. Take the time you need to review your credit report, correct any errors, improve your credit score, collect documentation and educate yourself.

You can also attend a free or low-cost online or in-person first-time home buyer education class offered by HUD-certified housing counselors. Prospective buyers learn about many home buying topics, including budgeting, financing and homeownership.

First-time home buyers feeling overwhelmed by the cost of buying a home should look into first-time home buyer assistance programs. Discover what help you may qualify for to cover your down payment or closing costs.

2. Save Enough Cash

One way to minimize home buying stress is to make sure you have enough cash saved for a down payment.

You may have heard that you need to make a 20% down payment to buy a house, but that's only when you’re taking out a conventional loan and want to avoid paying private mortgage insurance (PMI). The minimum conventional loan down payment is 3%. A Federal Housing Administration (FHA) mortgage requires a minimum down payment of 3.5%.

Whether you plan on making a larger or smaller down payment – don’t deplete your savings. Remember, the down payment is just the first cost of buying a home. You’ll need to pay closing costs next. After closing, you’ll likely need to pay moving fees and buy stuff to furnish your new home. And you’ll need enough coming in or saved to make your ongoing monthly mortgage payment.

Ensuring you have money to spend after your down payment will help reduce the possibility of stressful financial situations later on.

3. Be Flexible About Expectations

Unrealistic expectations are a significant contributor to home buying stress. As a buyer in a seller’s market, you may need to adjust (and readjust) your expectations. Your parents may have purchased their forever home at your age, but that same investment in today’s dollars may only buy a starter home.

Where are some areas you can compromise? You may want a guest bedroom, but do you need it? Can you start house hunting in a more affordable neighborhood to expand your selection of available homes for sale?

4. Consider A Starter Home

If you can’t buy your forever home right now, think about buying a starter home. Starter homes typically cost less and require less maintenance because they’re smaller. Consider approaching your home search with the mindset of buying a starter home you can live in now. This approach may help reduce the stakes of your home search if you see the starter home as a future investment toward your forever home.

The good thing about real estate is that it usually appreciates over the long term. While you may not stay in your first home for long, it can find a permanent spot in your real estate portfolio. You can sell the property or rent it out when you discover your forever home.

If the home you purchase falls short of your expectations, you can renovate and improve it to meet your expectations. And in the meantime, you’re building home equity.

5. Get Approved

The preapproval process is the first step toward buying a home. You submit your financial information and paperwork to your lender, and they run your credit and calculate your debt-to-income ratio to see what home loans you qualify for and determine how much you can afford to spend on a home. Knowing how much you can borrow should help you avoid putting in offers over your budget – a mistake that can be stressful and financially destructive.

6. Know Exactly How Much You Can Afford

As you begin house hunting, create and stick to your budget. Determine an offer price that’s your absolute ceiling – and don’t offer to pay a penny more. If you’re anxious about being able to afford your new home without needing to make drastic lifestyle changes, realistic budgeting and careful financial planning should ease your anxiety.

7. Make A House-Hunting Checklist

Create a list of must-haves to check at each home you consider and share it with your agent. In hot markets, it can be helpful to pare down your list to the nonnegotiables. For instance, if you need three bedrooms, don’t waste your time looking at homes with two bedrooms. If you love a house but don’t love the longer commute to work, move on to another listing to save yourself time and future stress.

8. Trust Your Instinct

The number one rule to follow is to trust your instincts. If something doesn't feel right about a particular agent or the bidding on a home, your gut is usually right. Don’t allow anyone to pressure you into making any decisions when you think something is off or isn’t the right fit.

Take the first step towards buying a house.

Get approved with Rocket Mortgage® to see what you qualify for.
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How A Real Estate Agent Can Help You Manage Home Buying Stress

Working with a REALTOR® or real estate agent may be one of the best ways to reduce home buying stress.

Here’s how an agent can alleviate your anxiety throughout the entire process:

They Can Help You Find The Right House

You’ll rely on your agent to act as your eyes and ears and notify you when a house is listed. If you can’t visit the home immediately, you may need to rely on your agent’s virtual tour and feedback about the home. A buyer’s agent has a fiduciary duty to represent your interests, so you can rest assured that your agent is looking for the right house for you.

They Can Help You Make An Offer

Your real estate agent will also be front and center during the stressful process of making an offer. REALTORS® can help you understand what the market will bear and tailor your offer accordingly. That includes offering advice on whether you need to make a clean, no-contingency offer. They can submit your offer letter to the seller and their agent. And your agent can diplomatically deliver the bad news if your offer isn’t accepted.

They Can Help You Negotiate The Purchase Agreement

If your offer is accepted, your agent will negotiate the purchase agreement. If you waived the home inspection contingency, your agent can reserve your right to an informational home inspection. However, your lender will likely require a home appraisal even if you waived the appraisal contingency.

They Can Help You Honor The Purchase Agreement

Your agent can recommend a home inspector, help you schedule everything and make sure your lender gets what they need to move the transaction from a signed purchase agreement to closing day.

If the home inspection or appraisal raises serious questions about the home’s condition, your agent can help you decide whether to back out of the sale. They can even help you get your earnest money deposit back if the seller fails to disclose a significant problem with the home.

The Bottom Line: You Can Overcome Stress And Achieve Homeownership

There’s no question that the stress of buying a home can be overwhelming, but you can manage the stress and become a homeowner with some preparation and financial discipline.

If you’re ready to begin your house hunt and experience the advantages of homeownership, head over to Rocket Mortgage® to begin the application process so you and your agent can start searching for homes.

Take the first step towards buying a house.

Get approved with Rocket Mortgage® to see what you qualify for.
NMLS #3030
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Headshot of Ben Luthi, personal finance and travel writer for Rocket Money.

Beth Kirton